Cutthroat Competition

By KAYLA MATHIEU ‘21

As seniors have already turned in their early applications and the regular application deadline approaches, the era of forbidden questions has begun. Don’t ask a senior anything about college. This topic is something you tiptoe around from now until seniors wear the apparel of their college of choice in May. These are simply the rules for Classes II-IV. In the senior class, it seems as though the habit of avoiding college questions lasts all year. The competition between classmates to get into the best schools seems to keep people from conversing about the process altogether, even among friends. This competitive nature of Milton students can be seen not only in the college process, but throughout ordinary school life as well.

We love to claim that we foster a strong sense of community here, but when it comes down to it, it really is every person for themself. Given the cutthroat competition for success, a competitive attitude is the expectation, but there is a fine line between healthy competition and destructive competition. The competition that exists between classmates—and even more importantly, friends—can be toxic to the relationships that we foster in high school. Because we are driven by such a competitive mindset, anyone who gets in our way is just another obstacle on our road to success. This is not just an epidemic at Milton but everywhere. For instance, many view affirmative action as a handout to people of color, particularly Black and Hispanic students. Harvard is currently undergoing an affirmative action lawsuit that, in my book, can be classified as a competition at its worst. A group called Students for Fair Admissions, run by Edward Blum, is accusing Harvard of placing excess weight on race in the admissions process and therefore puts Asian students at a disadvantage. The Asian students suing Harvard have found that other students of color are giving them competition in Harvard admissions; therefore, this suit serves as their response to such competition. Though an extreme case, this suit demonstrates clearly what the competitive attitudes thats we foster at Milton can become if we aren't careful about how far we take competition.

Once everyone finally does figure out where they are going to school, and the era of the forbidden question comes to an end, a phrase that I will hear all too often is “how did she get in there?” Instead of simply being happy for one another, we question why our peer did so well. Even when the process is over, the competitive attitude remains. Milton students have developed an inability to be genuinely happy for others who do well. We all do it in our own way. It may be a look that you give at prize ceremony when the same person wins all the awards or the rolling of your eyes when your friend gets an A+ and you get only an A. Furthermore, we seem to be obsessed with “one-upping” each other. No matter what it takes, we are determined to be better than even our closest friends. While striving for such excellence is admirable, when we begin losing sleep over it, it becomes dangerous.

I am most definitely not suggesting that we lose the competitive edge that makes us one of the best private schools in the country, but I am suggesting that students should think about how competitive they are and how it will shape their character. If your competitive attitude alters the way in which you interact with others, then I encourage you to rethink your approach to competition.

Milton Academy Graduation 2018, Image Courtesy of Milton Academy