Parents and Our College Process

By KAROL QUERIDO ‘22

It’s officially November: first semester interim grades come out, teachers try to squeeze in every bit of information before exams, and much to seniors’ chagrin, early college applications are due. According to Mr. Skinner, the Dean of College Counseling, 95% of our seniors are applying early this year, and that number has steadily grown in the recent past. As seniors write college essays and juniors stress over bolstering their resumes, freshmen and sophomores are expected to bask in their sweet tranquility. 

However, this past Parents’ Weekend, parents of sophomores had the option of attending an open college readiness meeting. I tagged along as my mother’s translator, and found, not surprisingly, that I was one of 6 students present; there were 4 sophomores and 1 freshman there. The meeting served as a forum for questions and a chance for parents to gain more information about the daunting college process. As I listened to Mr. Skinner talk about extracurriculars, course loads, and standardized testing, I wondered why this meeting was advertised to parents only.  That many of my classmates had no idea this meeting existed is a crucial problem in Milton’s approach to the college process. Although your families should be in the loop about your future plans, they should not be in control of such an important decision. 

 We saw it with Felicity Huffman, center of the recent college admissions scandal that exploded in the news, and we see it with overbearing parents all too often. This parent-guided approach favors privileged high school students who rely on their parents to jumpstart their college interests instead of taking the initiatives themselves. Students who have decades of generational legacy at a top-notch university or those whose families are extremely wealthy are more inclined to take a backseat role in the college process. It seems to me that Milton is playing an active role in solidifying this ideology and thereby marginalizing less privileged students. 

That day, the college office urged the parents “not to stress” but to seriously consider their children’s courses, strengths, and weaknesses. Personally, my parents have never been invested in the specifics of my education, and this freedom has granted me my independence of thought. 

Although I do understand that Milton wants to lessen the stress on their students by pushing off the college talk until junior year, this delay does not adequately prepare our students for the whirlwind that hits them during their junior and senior years. I asked some seniors about how they were feeling going into this formidable process and how helpful the college office has been. One student, who wishes to remain anonymous says, “our college counselors are helpful in some ways but they are very vague in general.” Another senior remarks about how they “wish teachers started talking about it earlier because [they] were a little overwhelmed by all of the different parts of the process.” I sympathize with these students and I see how Milton could improve in some of these areas. For example, this year, a couple sophomores wanted to take initiative and take the PSAT in order to gain a sense of what taking a three hour test is like and to know how to better prepare for the impending PSAT and SAT junior year. However, after approaching the college office about registering for the test, students were told that the test was reserved only for repeating sophomores and juniors. When a parent asked about this little Milton quirk, Mr. Skinner remarked that he saw no point in “practicing for a practice,'' emphasizing that the PSAT is a preliminary SAT, and that more and more colleges are dropping the standardized test component in application requirements. However, the PSAT and other standardized tests, at Milton, hold more significance than we are accrediting to them. According to the College Board, a high score on the PSAT in the fall of junior year can open doors to National Merit scholarships, which, for some students, is worth practicing for. However, not all students take issue with Milton’s approach, with one student’s saying, “I think Milton needs to work on communication a little more but other than that I think the process is fine.” Communication with parents is definitely a necessary component for ensuring a smooth process, but more important is communication with the students, especially those who don’t have resources of information beyond Milton’s campus.